Happy President’s Day

16 Feb

Onr of the perks of working at BAC is that we get all sorts of holidays that I never had before.  If the stock market is closed, we are too.  Not only did TAC not recognize these holidays, but neither did my Alma mater, so its been a long time since I’ve had President’s Day off.

J has to work, so I planned on celebrating by sleeping late, folding laundry, and cooking a pulled pork.  Fascinating, and just the way Lincoln would have done it, I think.  I also had to be available for the oil man to clean my boiler and get my hot water to last for more than 10 minutes.  He was scheduled to appear at 2.

No, strike that, he was scheduled to appear last Wednesday between 8-9 am.  He did not show up, and when I called the oil company at 9:10, they said there was an emergency and he couldn’t come until that afternoon.  Nice communication, huh?  I made a 9:50 train and told them to come back on Monday at 2.

So, now that you know how my day was supposed to go, here’s what actually happened:

3:40am: Say goodbye to J, who warns me that its really cold outside, and not to go out unless I have to.  No problem!  (by the way, its actually a nice day.  J forgets that its always cold prior to the buttcrack of dawn).

7:40am: House phone rings, forcing me out of my nice, warm, down comforted bed.  I hope its J, calling to say he’s getting out early and bringing me coffee and donuts, but no luck. 

Its the oil company, and I mentally prepare how I will fire them if they cancel on me again.  They want to know if the oil guy can come this morning instead, at 8:30/8:45.  Hoping to actually see hot water by the end of the day, I agree. 

7:50am: Since I don’t have time to go to sleep or run before the guy gets here, I head for the coffee pot.  I had no coffeee yesterday, and actually remembered to buy some at the market, so I’m excited. 

I clean out the coffee from a week ago (ew) and get ready to load up the coffee pot.  No filters.  I contemplate using a paper towel, then decide to suck it up and go to the store.

7:55am: Arrive at store, secretly pissed because the Shaws right next me is closing and worthless, so I have to drive a whole 3  minutes to Stop & Shop, which is empty.  Make mental note to grocery shop before 8 on Mondays whenever possible. 

Grab coffee filters (the brown ones, because that makes me feel earthy crunchy) and sweet potatoes (because those will go well with pulled pork).  Think about how the self scan is the greatest invention ever, so no one has to see me in my PJs with unbrushed teeth (I chewed a frozen piece of gum, just in case I had to speak to someone else).  Scan stuff, send it down the belt, straight into someones coffee cup.  Coffee pours into end of conveyor belt, luckily not on to my filters.  Woman comes to retrieve stuff, I told her that her coffee spilled because I had no idea it was there (mentally adding: because only a moron would leave their coffee in a randome spot in a public place.  It could have been roofied!)

8:04am: Pull into my street, right behind the oil guy.  Thirty minutes eary.  I can’t win.  Luckily, he gets lost, so I have a full 2 minutes to start my coffee. 

8:15am: Oil guy tells me my home inspector was a moron and you can get a license to do inspections online, so what he said about my hot water (that the control was stuck) isn’t true.  I tell him to fix something anyways, because I am not taking another lukewarm shower. 

9:10am: Oil guy calls me down to the basement to show me the new valve thingie and complain about gas prices, Corrollas, the American government and his girlfriend’s kids, plus add that we have some pipe he doesn’t think we need and that the boiler should last us ten more years.  I wonder if I’ll be charged extra for the commentary.

So, now its 9:26 am and I’m too hopped up on caffine to go back to bed.  I guess I’ll go for a run on the treadmill and pray the oil fumes don’t kill me.  Like Washington would have done.

Edited to add: When I finally got around to using the hot water at 1pm, I realized we had none at all.  The dope forgot to turn the furnace back on.  After waiting for two hours for the water to heat up, I realized my shower is still not hot enough, and have sice moved my crap into J’s shower downstairs while I try to figure out where to find a good plumber.

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